Top ten Signs that you’re not in control

By Torry Stiles

10. Every restaurant you visit must serve chicken nuggets.
9. Off to freshman orientation for college and your mom picks out your underwear.
8. Hanging out with friends at one of those pricey bars drinking something that tastes like PineSol because you’re afraid to let on that you hate those weird beers.
7. You’re driving five miles under the speed limit because the luggage rack on the car behind you looks like a cop car’s lights.
6. Future mother-in-law coming to visit so the ceiling mirror has to come down.
5. You’re making a 3AM visit to the gas station for dog treats.
4. The cat decides when it’s time to go to bed.
3. You sit through a 2-hour cartoon marathon complete with a blow-by-blow detailing of last week’s show.
2. You’ve never turned down a Facebook friend request.
1. You dump a girlfriend because your dog doesn’t like her.