Top 10 signs your kid needs to date someone else

By Torry Stiles

10. They’re talking about baby names, and she says the hardest part is picking a last name.

9. He can’t join the family on a swim because it might short out his ankle bracelet.

8. You overhear him talking to her on the phone and he uses the phrase “visitation hours” a lot.

7. He mentions his father is on TV but fails to mention it was the bank’s surveillance camera footage.

6. The boyfriend drives a different car every week but never carries any car keys.

5. She offers to drive him to his Little League game.

4. He suggests you fix that second-floor window that sticks a little.

3. She doesn’t want flowers, just commissary money.

2. He didn’t get a letter from your old alma mater. He’s wearing your sweater.

1.You mention that your daughter has told you a lot about him, and he starts rubbing his “Snitches get stitches” tattoo.