Torry’s Top Ten: Signs you might not be ready for ‘normal’

Top Ten signs you might not be ready for “normal”

by Torry Stiles

  1. Six feet still isn’t enough distance for some of the people you meet out there. 
  2. Twelve months of picking up your food in styrofoam containers have made food on a china plate taste funny. 
  3. All of those online classes you’ve taken over the last year now qualify you for a pay hike which the company can’t afford so you’re getting laid off.  
  4. The office took a vote and you were asked to keep working from home and never to bring your boiled cabbage lunches back into the office microwave. 
  5. The boy flunked English last semester after accidentally erasing his term paper and replacing it with highlights from his last online “Belch the Alphabet” challenge. 
  6. That hand sanitizer blog you write netted you six figures last year. 
  7. You get worried your couch is broken until you realize it is the perfect imprint of you. 
  8. Your “steppin’ out shoes” are boxed up in the closet but you’ve got your masks sorted by “formal, semi-formal and casual.”
  9. The DoorDash driver wants you to go with him to get matching tattoos. 
  10. Your financial report to the Board included annual reports, expenses, revenue projections and a killer banana bread recipe.