Torry’s Top Ten: Reasons I can’t sell women’s products

Top Ten Reasons I Can’t Sell Women’s Products

by Torry Stiles

10. “This would’ve looked good on you back before gravity won.”

9. “Oh, no, ma’am. I wasn’t laughing. Okay. Okay. Yes I was.”

8. “You want more shoes? Why?”

7. “This would’ve looked good on you 50 pounds ago.”

6. “It says it’s strapless but I could staple some on if you need ‘ em.”

5. “We got some of those grease pencils for your eyes.”

4. “If those wires are too stiff I got my knife and I can cut ’em out.”

3. “There’s a color called ‘champagne?’ Really?”

2. “My mom wore this look. It might come back.”

1. “Just take the shopping bag and wear it over your head.”