Torry’s Top Ten: Modern parenting problems

Top ten parenting problems our parents never had to worry about

by Torry Stiles

10. “The counselor says if the child wants to do girly things you encourage girly things. If the child wants boy stuff you do boy stuff. My kid is on a leash because he wants to be a Rottweiler.”

9.”Honey, I forget. Are we pro- or anti-vaccination these days?”

8. “Nobody likes kale, dear. But if you don’t eat it the other mommies will post bad things about me on Facebook.”

7. “We don’t play with those children – they go to public schools. Come back here and finish your yogurt.”

6. “When the teacher says not to smoke she only means tobacco and not Daddy’s medicine.”

5. “Why does my six year-old have an Amazon account?”

4. “I’m not happy about her inappropriate webcam site but I can’t argue against the six-figure check she gets each month.”

3. “We’re vacationing virtually, dear. Put your goggles back on.”

2. “Bujjj uhh vepokky kg f2f ft xxx”

— Baby’s first tweet

1. “The baby threw up on my FitBit. I got 500 extra steps.”