TOP TEN REASONS MY WIFE NEEDS TO SMACK ME EVERY ONCE IN A WHILE

By Torry Stiles

10. Wife: “We should get a couple’s massage.”

Me: “I’m game. Which couple?”

9. Wife: “Do you want to sit in here and watch this show with me?”

Me: “I just ate.”

8. Wife: “How come you never write about me in your lists?”

Me: “The blood thinner I’m on makes me bruise easier.”

7. Wife: “You didn’t say anything about my hair.”

Me: “You looked like you’d already had a rough day.”

6. Wife: “Can you come home early tomorrow?”

Me: “What am I in trouble for now?”

5. Wife: “We could save some money if I stayed home and cooked supper.”

Me: “I’ll see if I can pull an extra shift this week.”

4. Wife: “I thought you said you’d be on time.”

Me: “I thought you said you lost your watch.”

3. Wife: “Why are you taking my car off-road?”

Me: “This isn’t off-road: they’ve got telephone poles and power lines over there.”

2. Wife: “Is this restaurant any good?”

Me: “It must be; it has the word ‘grille’ in its name and they spelled it with the extra ‘e’.”

1. Wife: “Are we lost?” Me: “No. I’m not sure where we are but I’m pretty sure where we’re going.”