By Torry Stiles
10. Take control of the company Muzak account and play nothing but old Redd Foxx comedy routines.
9. Launch a weekly Casual Drinking Friday.
8. Spend the day referring to everybody as “Bub.”
7. Invite that Top Ten guy to come in and give an inspirational speech. Pay him handsomely.
6. Replace the MSDS manuals with old Archie comic books just to see how long it takes someone to notice.
5. Forklifts were made to run the Figure-8.
4. 30-hour work week and a kitten at every desk.
3. Ask the safety officer to do a cup check.
2. When you get one of those sales calls from some foreign phone room immediately ask if they’re the police. Demand to talk to a sergeant.
1. Go back to bed and stay there.