TOP 10 THINGS I’VE ACCOMPLISHED SINCE THE QUARENTINE BEGAN

By Torry Stiles

10. Found toilet paper.

9. Taught the family to appreciate the Asian grocery store’s ability to get stuff Kroger can’t. …. like ramen noodles, snails and toilet paper.

8. Discovered we can eat like kings so long as kings like barbecue sauce, fig newtons, ramen noodles and snails.

7. Spent the time spring cleaning. Found my high school yearbook. Real glad plaid polyester went out of style and stayed there.

6. Bragged to everyone about how I was smart enough to NOT go on a cruise.

5. Made plans to book a cruise when this is all over and prices are in the basement.

4. Laundered everything I own that doesn’t bark or have a cord.

3. Alphabetized my sock drawer.

2. Reached the point where my dogs no longer want to hear the phrase, “Want to go for a walk?”

1.Learned how to annoy my wife even before she gets out of bed.