TOP 10 SIGNS YOU’RE FAILING AT THE WHOLE ADULT THING

By Torry Stiles

  1. You yell, “Shotgun!” when Uber arrives.
  2. Mom drove you to your high school reunion.
  3. The only thing you can manage at the karaoke bar is, “The Itsy Bitsy Spider.”
  4. More than one intimate relationship has been destroyed because you called her, “Mom.”
  5. A Rare Pokemon sighting got you fired.
  6. You ask for a straw with your beer.
  7. You bought a tattoo with the money you saved by letting them repo your car.
  8. You’re 30 years old and you don’t know what size underwear you need.
  9. You ask your mom to call the girl you’re trying to break up with.
  10. The divorce decree included the disposition of your GI Joes.