Top 10 signs that this is not your grandfather’s county fair

By Torry Stiles

10. Hemp is not just for macramé anymore.

9. The Fair Queen’s escort is her parole officer.

8. The ride operators are better dressed than most of the riders.

7.  The Cattle Club is advertising beef as a plant-based food.

6. They’ve got more different stuff battered and deep fried in one booth than they used to have at the whole fair.

5. There hasn’t been a good old-fashioned hair-pulling cat fight over the pecan pie contest since Nixon.

4. Wallets don’t have chains nowadays.

3. There used to be guy selling weed in the parking lot. Now you’ve got the CBD products right between the Methodist’s booth and a guy selling gutter covers.

2.  There hasn’t been a hootchie-cootchie show in 50 years since the young ladies started wearing less than the dancers did.

1.Some marketing genius had all of the porta potties labelled as “Unisex.”