Print Edition

November 29, 2014

  • Serving Indy’s Southside Since 1928

Torry’s Top Ten

Top ten Thanksgiving Day pet peeves by Torry Stiles When there’s no real mayonnaise for the cold turkey sandwiches. Anybody under the age of 13 who is complaining about how the holidays have become too commercialized… not like when they were little. People who would rather shop than be with family enjoying the holiday. People in turkey costumes running marathons. Tofurkey. Family members who know about my doctor-imposed...

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Torry’s Top Ten 11/20/14

Top ten reasons pigs don’t enjoy Thanksgiving   by Porkrinds Stiles   [Dear readers – Many of you may recall that I have a pet pig living in my house. For those of you who don’t recall: I have a pet pig living in my house. She is pleasant enough company but like to see her name in print from time to time. – Torry Stiles]   Some of my bestest friends were turkeys. Macaroni an’ cheese. They...

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Torry’s Top Ten 11/13/14

Top ten signs it’s going to be a tough winter in Indy   by Torry Stiles   There are fewer furnace repair companies promising one-hour service. People are acting like hockey is important again. If you look real close you’ll see that not only are the wooly worms’ coats thicker but they come with teeny-tiny mittens. The pumpkin displays have been replaced by skids of sidewalk salt. The Mayor’s Action...

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Torry’s Top Ten 11/06/14

Top ten reasons you’re not getting or keeping the quality employees you need   $7.25/hour is fine if you want workers who still live with Mom and drive a Schwinn. The only reason there are new company shirts is because the laundry company had changed the name tag so many times the fronts were wore out. The safety officer’s nickname is Stumpy. Even the company’s bank is refusing to cash your employees’...

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Torry’s Top Ten 10/30/14

Top ten rejected Long’s Donuts ads by Torry Stiles (Author’s disclaimer: This is not a paid advertisement…. However, we could probably make an appropriate arrangement. Say… One dozen yeast a week? Half a dozen? …. Have your people talk to my people.) (Editor’s disclaimer: Any deal better include the newsroom or Mr. Stiles can go back to writing these lists on cocktail napkins.) “Might as well...

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