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March 25, 2017

  • Serving Indy’s Southside Since 1928

Are you ready for the Halloween Hare to visit your garden?

Did you set aside a few pieces of candy to appease him when he makes his midnight witching-hour call on your garden? And if he doesn’t find what he’s looking for – oh the horror. What will he do to your garden? If you’ve never heard of the Halloween Hare, according to ancient gardening legend, the Halloween Hare hops from garden to garden on Halloween night looking for Easter candy not found in the spring Easter egg hunt. If the...

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The vegetable orchestra?

Eeeeek! There’s an elephant in the crisper drawer! Under the influence of the lowquality American diet, born of the Industrial Revolution, human disease rates have accelerated in parallel with the increased consumption of super- sized, lifeless, ready-to-eat processed food, and genetically altered produce; contrived food the Great Architect never intended Earth’s perfectly created earthly inhabitants to consume. According to the...

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Torry's Top Ten scariest Halloween costumes for our modern world

10. Runny-nosed kid who likes to hug … 9. Replacement window salesman. 8. Foul-mouthed person with Bluetooth arguing in the grocery store check-out line. 7. Co-worker who recently quit smoking. 6. Glee fan the day after a new episode. 5. Grinning toddler with a Sharpie. 4. Losing football coach teaching health class. 3. Texting teen-aged store clerk. 2. 45-year-old Molly Hatchet fan. 1. Cop with a radar gun on Southport...

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Don’t even try to fight tradition and heritage of autumnal doughnuts

Maybe it’s the time of year. Maybe it’s because they’re forbidden. Maybe I simply don’t have anything better to do with my time. But lately I have been obsessed with … Doughnuts. Also known as Donuts, Do-Nuts, Sinkers, Hockey Pucks and Bagels for Gentiles. I think this is mostly a seasonal obsession. After all, it is autumn, and is there any treat more autumnal than cider and doughnuts? You can make a meal of them if you add a side of...

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Halloween: my chance

Even dating back to when I was a little kid, Halloween has never been about the candy for me. Instead, I’ve always been excited about the annual opportunity to be someone who I am not, and recently that’s been a guy who can grow a mustache. Some may remember my publicized New Year’s resolution in which I did not set a goal for myself but instead challenged my facial hair to come in fuller or stop growing altogether. Like most New...

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